Holidays

Wayhey! We're really in the great sunny depths of summer now, and you can tell by the massive drop in world population (NationStates of course). Just as I predicted in my article on the dreaded Summer Death, we've dropped by about ten thousand nations because suddenly everyone's compared the great outdoors with the blank brain-destroying computer screen and gone with the right choice.

I'm going to be spending the next weekend in Fort William where, if you know the place, is an epicentre for midgies everywhere. It is the seething fiery whirlpool from which all of Satan's nasties are wrought. It is quite possibly the place where man sinned so badly that the Lord spake that he should forever goeth with a hunch while batting the air desperately with one hand while trying to shut off all orifices with the other, lest one of these wingéd demons attempt to fly into them.

To further stress my point, you'll usually see midgies in small flittery 'clouds' hovering about a metre or so above the ground doing God-knows-what. In Fort William, they are a fog. They are a black thunderstorm of insectile death. They are a pyroclastic flow of scratchy sores, itchy backs in that-spot-you-can-never-quite-reach, and that awful buzzy hmmmm noise they make when in large numbers.

So, yeah, I can't wait for my holiday. Whoop.